Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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