Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
