so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
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