why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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