I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize