If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
