My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
sick fucks of a feather flock together
foreskin is a definite game changer
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize