yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
