kristin has been a bad kristin
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
