And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
