your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
My balls are so social today.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Randomize
