The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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