I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize