when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
no you cant smoke seaweed
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Ladies don't puke and tell
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
