The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
