he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
