Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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