Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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