why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
All the doctor said was why
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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