i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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