I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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