im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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