Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
they call him Oral-B. enough said
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
