your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
