i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Randomize
