Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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