Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Sorry about my life...
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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