I bet he comes in French.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
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