So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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