You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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