Can Purell be used as lube?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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