drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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