I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
