it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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