this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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