girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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