Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I accidentally had phone sex last night
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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