dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
