He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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