We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
