Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
