Your face is a jimmy john
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
