..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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