If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
