Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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