"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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