if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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