my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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