I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
