i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize