tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
